Promising Winter Hollyhock - White Sulphur Springs, Montana

“I used to feel sad on New Year's Eve, clinging to the old year, never wanting it to be over. I avoided good-byes for the same reason, clinging to what was, simply because it was known, whereas the future was unknown and therefore to be worried over. How much fear has controlled my life . No longer!

... I pat my firm thighs and promise to banish further negative thinking...I raise my glass to being big, beautiful, feminine, and forever changing, promising to work with my bones and flesh. After all , bones make new bones if they are exercised, skin sheds itself to make room for fresh flesh, muscles untangle and restore their strength. I truly have rejoined the human race.”

  -Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, pages 90-91

Harvest Path - Near Park City, Montana

“A quiet presence over takes me, and my pulse slows. My hands relax, and my palms open spontaneously as I am reduced to blessed clarity. I feel subtle yearning for adventure, similar to the way I felt last fall. Haven't I been counting on seeing new paths? Don't they abound everywhere, out here?”

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p.97

Experience Calm - Big Arm, Flathead Lake, Montana

“It has become my way to dispense with incessant seeking in favor of stumbling upon answers. In the words of Picasso, "I find, I do not seek.” No longer desperate to know every outcome these days I tend to wait and see, a far more satisfying way of being that lacks specificity and instead favors experience over analysis.”

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p. 163-164

Wonder More - Ladybug - Big Arm, Flathead Lake, Montana

“Here, where much more is hidden than apparent, I am reminded that a companion to mystery is peace; that knowing less and wondering more offers expectancy.”

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p. 163

Genuine Ladybug - Flathead Lake, Big Arm, Montana

“ “But I no longer want to edit my behavior, twisting myself up like a pretzel.“ 

“You won't ,” she assured me. "Now that you've tasted the other, you won't go backwards. It'll be better than ever, you'll see. Just let whatever comes flow through you and then away.  

Everyone is after the same thing, y'know. It's called intimacy. The only way to experience it is to be yourself.” “

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p.138

Isolated Eavesdropping - On Hwy 200, Montana

“I'm learning to surrender both to the grueling work and to the isolation. When I need centering, I sing a favourite hymn, "Spirit of God descend upon my heart," which also allows me to eavesdrop on my spirit and pick up on its mumblings.”

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p.131

Everyday Holiness - Montana

I’ve had this thought-full quote in pocket and it seems fitting for today, both in light of current US events AND because today is Ukrainian (or Orthodox) Christmas Day. Oh, that we will walk with eyes open to see holiness and value in our everyday people and places (hmmmm... like Jesus does....).

“My mind wanders to a friend who trained monks in ritualization. “When they started Communion,” she explained, “they would pick up the chalice without giving it any thought, purely an object to be used, not treated as holy. What they needed to learn was the importance of developing a relationship with liturgical things and become involved with them. Only then would the ceremony have meaning.” 

Listening to her, I couldn't help but imagine what my world might be like if I looked at the human beings I was closest to as holy and treated them with that same sense of respect.”

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p. 73-74

Back To Work View - Missoula, Montana

A perspective pointer toward gratitude for added benefits of getting out of bed on chilly winter mornings to go to work (besides the glorious sunrise bonus!):

“My grandmother used to say, “As the hands toil, so the spirit is raised above the troubled motions of the mind.” 

 -Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p. 69

Neurosis At Bay, For Today - Greenough Park, Missoula, Montana

“I think it was Thomas Merton who said that the easiest way to rid yourself of neurosis is to surround yourself with nature, or more specifically trees.

"You can't be neurotic in front of a bunch of trees," he claimed; nor, I hasten to add, in front of dunes or sea or humble scrub pine. 

Standing here at the edge of the world shows me how exaggerated my own emotions seem to be. 

This, strong, silent place interrupts confusion, rage, and depression, and just now I feel more at home with the landscape than with people.”

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p.13

Looking Toward Joy - Missoula, Montana

“I read somewhere that the Frenchwoman's role is to please others, but to please herself in the process ! This concept is new for me, that my own joy is my responsibility . Only I can receive it , and, likewise, only I can allow others to take it away. Not this Christmas ! I've had my fill of bleak midwinters and now set my sights on joy.”    
-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p. 72

Nice and Quiet - Missoula, Montana

“Silence is a good friend, I repeat, as if saying a mantra. It allows for the natural progression of things. 

Still, I remain nervous, anxious to fill the void as I used to with interesting questions, chit chat, sweet nothings that nice girls like me were taught to utter. ...Now what takes the place of nice, I wonder?”

-Joan Anderson, in A Year By The Sea, p. 73